7 Devastating Mistakes Elizabeth Warren Does In Her Email Newsletters
Updated: Oct 30, 2019
Hello Ms. Warren.
Huge fans here.
I personally became an admirer ever since that day you roasted the CEO of Wells Fargo.
That smell of roasted flesh reached us half way across the world. And here in the Eastern block we still love when a random rich guy gets roasted.
What a woman, I thought
Sadly, your email newsletters do not reflect the woman you are.
We keep a track of them. We keep a track of most of the awesome things you do.
But there are bunch of things gone wrong with your email newsletters.
I will take your latest one as an example and then dissect it piece by piece, in true cavalier style. (You can see the whole newsletter here)
Shall we, Ms Warren?
Too many adverbs..
Those bloody adverbs. Words that end with “-ly” You should avoid them at any cost, not flaunt them on your very first line. Basic rule of thumb – no more than one adverb per paragraph. Ideally you should aim for zero. In your last newsletter there are at least two of them in each para. A big No.
Too many adjectives
See, we haven’t even proceeded beyond that flawed first line and we dag another issue. Your subject line is clogged with adjectives: "powerfully" "important" test
You should fire the writer who wrote that line.
"The pressure is on"
You should have started your email with that exact line. Short, crisp and powerful. Makes you ask questions and raises curiosity right from the start.
Too many Calls to Actions (CTAs)
More Calls to Action doesn’t equal more action. Two hyperlinked CTAs make sense but when mixed with bunch of buttons like in the sample above, the end result is 1) confusion and 2) email servers, treating your email like obvious Promo content. That’s where I have found your email – in my Promotions tabs. How many people do you think check their Promotions tab?
Your Sender ID
Please don’t use a generic email ID as your sender ID like in your case, firstname.lastname@example.org By doing so you are inviting yourself in that dreaded Promotions Tab instead of the Primary tab where you rightfully belong. The right way ahead is to use email@example.com or even firstname.lastname@example.org :)
Different sender names
One time I get your emails from Elizabeth Warren. Another time from Warren For President. Followed by Warren HQ. Followed by Elizabeth Warren.com. Followed by Warren2020. Can your guy behind the stage just make up his mind? Switching Sender names is a really bad idea for building habitual opening of your emails. And please never add a website URL as a Sender name.
Are your emails being written by a different intern every week? Some of them miss the Warren logo in header. Some of the subject lines are extremely short and others long. One of them features the most extraordinary Subject line we have ever seen in our copywriting work: wow. You might as well put yaay? Or wosh? Or cool? Or meeh? These are sure hits for a non-actionable, sleepy Subject lines that purr – Please don’t open this email.
From Arctic we go to Antarctica. Your subject line from a different campaign decided to stretch itself in length saying: I wouldn't ask if it weren't powerfully important -- will you help our campaign reach our goals before the September FEC deadline?
Again this, “powerfully" "important”? Did you take that phrase from DC Comics? What did we say about not using adjectives and not using adverbs? Your writer broke both the rules in a mere subject line. What can I say, I am amazed.
Your starting paragraphs sometimes count four lines and sometimes three words. Please stop joking around Ms Warren, America’s future is at stake.
These are small and easy tips you can apply today and see your delivery and Open rate spike and your constituency raised on its feet, taking action as if by magic. Best of all, you still won’t necessary appear as a sleazy Republican billionaire by putting these fixes in place.
Thumbs up and keep up the good fight.
And yes, we are available for hiring.